Day Seven: Jealousy

In Breaking Free, Pia Mellody believes that jealousy is “a combination of shame and anger.” Shame because you feel that you are less than others and, therefore, worthless. Anger because you believe that your significant other is being pulled away from you for a more interesting person. A cycle occurs where your significant other is…

Day Six: Extreme Problem Solving

My history of extreme problem solving has mostly been in relationships, but crossed over into my jobs, as well. Basically, extreme problem solving comes from an inability to communicate openly with others. You don’t express how you feel and don’t give others the opportunity to express their true feelings either. Consequently, extreme outbursts or seemingly…

Day Five: Financial Problems

“You may not be aware of how to deal with money appropriately. You may overspend or refuse to spend enough to have the basic necessities for living plus enjoying meeting some wants.” -Pia Mellody, Breaking Free I can’t think of many things to say about this one because I do have a problem with finances…

Day “Four”: Helplessness

As my “ten day” challenge to myself progresses, it’s apparent that my definition of a day is not the 24-hour term, but more like a day in regards to a long period of time… which is great. So, here we go: Helplessness! Here’s a great one: “Overwhelming others with your needs and wants.” This one…

Day Three: Your Reality

So, I thought I struggled with “Striving for Power” as a character defect, but after studying it more… I don’t think I do. Striving for Power is a different kind of control than people-pleasing or perfection. It’s more combative. My personality is more chill and passive. The next defect I can relate to is “Blaming…

Day Two: Perfectionism

“Perfectionism is that compulsive drive to do things perfectly, leaving no detail imperfect.” – Pia Mellody, Breaking Free If I were in a meeting where we were ‘fessing up to being perfectionists, I’m not sure I could 100% raise my hand. I can see my parents throwing their heads back in laughter at the idea of…

Day One: People-Pleasing

I’m an hour away from not meeting the deadline for the first day of my challenge. But! I have an hour, so here’s to day one! According to the Breaking Free workbook, people-pleasing produces three results: dishonesty, unnecessary arguments, and resentment. This character defect creates a sick cycle where you cater to others and expect them…

Step Six

So, my absence from this blog is an obvious symptom of codependency. I enjoy self-sabotage during my leisure time. I could’ve written many blogs in the past month… but I found something else to do instead. Lovely. But! This time around, I will not succumb to my old habits. I am in recovery from my…